I’ve been kind of in a deep funk all day. I was so busy on Friday, Saturday and Sunday, getting everything ready for the small dinner party I had Sunday night, I really didn’t have time to think about much else. Over the last few days I’ve been listening to the news about the horrible tragedy in Connecticut and reading a good bit about it online. I think the culmination of it all just finally got to me.
Last night I had a nightmare. I dreamed my son (who is now grown) was a baby and my husband and I had left him in the care of someone else, someone who was baby sitting him. When we went to pick him up, I knew something was wrong. The person there wouldn’t give us any answers as to where our child was and kept making up stories and excuses. There was a baby in a playpen that I thought/hoped was him, but when I picked it up, it was only a doll.
We frantically left to go search for our son, afraid we wouldn’t find him in time before something terrible happened. When we got outside, all the tires on our car were flat, so we were paralyzed, unable to go find our son. At that point I awoke. That’s usually what happens when a dream gets too awful, too terrifying to continue. I know that nightmare is a result of all I’ve been hearing in the news, especially the part about all the parents waiting in the gym, being told there were no more children coming out of the school.
I haven’t posted about the Sandy Hook tragedy because there’s little I can add that you haven’t already heard on every talk show, newscast, radio show, etc… Also, I have always wanted BNOTP to be a place you could count on to be uplifting, a place where you know you’ll always leave with a smile on your face. I’ve tried to keep things normal around here. I tried to post this morning and everything I had to post seemed ridiculous and trivial. My heart grieves for the children who were lost and for every single person their lives touched. I know your heart grieves, too.
I’m going to work on a post now that will be a normal post, a fun post and I hope to have it up later this evening sometime. Well, at least by tomorrow. I need a post like that right now.